ARC Challenge – Day 3

ARC Challenge – Day 3releasing, Jesse Elder

I’m participating in a 7-day challenge called the ARC Challenge held by Jesse Elder. A friend introduced me and invited me to join. In just a couple of days, I’ve experienced a lot of resistance to Jesse and his challenges. I guess that’s a good sign!

Yesterday, he asked us to write a letter to someone whose behavior caused us pain or contributed to our sense of harm. The letter is to address unfinished business with that person, so we can let go of the pain and baggage we’re carrying around. Often the pain comes from a person we care about. Maybe like me, you never wanted to confront them. By writing a letter, burning it and releasing the energy, we are freeing ourselves to move on and lighten up in life. This is Jesse’s definition of “enlightenment”; simply to lighten up.

This isn’t a new idea to me. I’ve done burning bowl ceremonies with Unity before, but I had to dig deeper this time to find someone that I felt had hurt me and where I’m still carrying the pain. I searched my mind and heart and found a person. It was the leader of a men’s group I participated in my thirties. I received much benefit, wisdom and connection from the leader and our group. However, one night the leader’s choices hurt me and seemed to violate the rules of our group. So I’ve written, burned and released a letter to this man.

Here are the suggestions for the process in case you feel you would like to release some old baggage.

  • Think of someone whose behavior caused you harm and that you still have challenging feelings.
  • Write a letter expressing all the feelings, the specific behavior, and your experience until you feel complete.
  • Find and write about the lessons you received from this experience
  • Who have you become as a result of this experience?
  • Thank the person for helping you to become who you are today.
  • Thank yourself for who you’ve become and the path you’ve taken. Acknowledge the courage, strength, pain, etc.
  • Forgive the person in your heart and the letter.
  • Burn the letter and release all related feelings of anger, fear, guilt. If desired, make a video of the burning ceremony to remember and honor the release.
  • Congratulations! You’ve released old baggage and stuck energy. Now you have room to allow more of your true self to shine forth.
  • You may want to make a ritual of doing this practice every few months, weeks or whatever feels right. I’m going to try once a week for a while.

By the way, my lessons were about trusting myself, reclaiming my power, compassion and becoming a leader. I may have more to write about this later.

May we rise and shine!



27 thoughts on “ARC Challenge – Day 3

    • Thank you Cynthia. It did feel freeing to write the letter. I’ve had a few conversations with him in my head, but not writing it all out and then releasing. I hope this clears some space for me to move forward more empowered and clear. I appreciate your support. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Wow!! That is amazing! You know I have been able to forgive friends and co-workers who caused me pain or hurt but not family members. Maybe it’s because I have higher expectations of family than somebody I’m not related to. I wish I could truly forgive certain of my cousins but at this point the hurt has gone too deep and the pain for so long that I’d be a hypocrite and a liar by writing a letter when I know that if I saw them on the street I would just pass them by. However in the years since the final incident which split us apart permanently I must admit they take us less and less space in my head. I went my way and they went theirs. Life does go on.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I appreciate your honesty DeBorah. You know what is best for you. Forgiveness has been a powerful tool and release for me. And there are still people and places within me that I hold pain and judgements. My motivation is to open myself to more love and flow in life. Hugs and blessings to you and yours…


  2. Wonderful Brad that you have reached inside and been able to release this old wound.. I have written several letters over time.. Several to my Mother, since her passing, as I asked her Why she chose to ignore me and then to forgive her.. I called them Angel Letters at the time and yes I burnt mine also..
    A great sense of getting those unspoken words off our chest caused relief..

    I hope the same emotions were felt by yourself as we let go of our hidden emotions we have for so long kept inside, often not even knowingly holding that pain..

    Love and blessings dear Brad.. Enjoy your day
    Sue ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Forgiveness is the key, but not always easy to use it. I thought I had done all that work and felt free, but recently when I suddenly saw a picture of a person from my past, I noticed my work was not finished. So more work ahead 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Thanks for sharing your experience, Brad, and for describing the technique so that others of us can experience it also. That’s very useful. It’s incredible how deeply some experiences can touch and influence us even years after they have occurred. Sometimes we are conscious of the mark they have left on us and other times not. Love & blessings, Sam 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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