Conflicted Constructs

Conflicted Constructsspring flowers, joy, poetry

feelings conflicted

life challenging soul choices



This post comes from a building feeling of internal unrest. I’ve been feeling blocked and not knowing what to write about because I want to be honest with my feelings, and I also want to empower and uplift others with my words. Reading about a similar contrast for Acacia on her blogΒ lead to writing this conflicted post!

I hope this is the breaking down of the old to make room for the new! My financial life is very challenging with almost no income and or savings left. I’m working two sales jobs and realize this is part of the problem by creating a lack of focus and commitment. And I’m having a hard time doing sales at all, especially for services that aren’t connected to my passions. I want to create work that is passionate and meaningful, but have no idea what that looks like. So what is the answer? I don’t know. I only know that something needs to shift.

I also feel conflicted between the spiritual ideal of loving myself and life as they are versus the practical reality that I need to do something to shift my life. As if often the case with life, the hardest things to do are what is needed. This situation clearly calls for trust, decision and action, three things that I’m not very good at doing. Β πŸ™‚

Thankfully, spring has arrived, offering joy and new beginnings. Then I start feeling hope, gratitude for life and the glimmer of trust that everything will be OK.

spring, joy, flowers

To spring and trust.




42 thoughts on “Conflicted Constructs

  1. Thank you for sharing openly about the paradox you’re experiencing. I’m guessing there are more than a few readers out there who will resonate. May the Holy Divine shower you with clear, juicy, shiny-breadcrumb clues and synchronicities that lead you in the direction of the joyful, meaningful, passionate work that’s waiting for you! Blessings, Jamie

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  2. The first step to initiating a shift is recognizing the need – in that respect, you are head of the curve Brad πŸ˜‰ I know it’s so much easier said than done (and very cliche), but just be yourself and be patient – the universe always conspires to help us if we allow it. Best wishes!

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  3. I can relate, Brad. Especially with “feeling blocked and not knowing what to write about because I want to be honest with my feelings, and I also want to empower and uplift others with my words.”
    Sending you lots of good vibes and an encouraging e-hug today, as you sort through your ‘constricted constructs.’ ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Good luck with finding a way shift things a little….sometimes when I really feel like I need to change things a little…I try and give more to my students…this makes me feel good and somehow (at times) re-directs the energy towards different paths….and different solutions.

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  5. Thank you for being brave and thank you for sharing …I know how hard it must be …but the fact that you are trying to stay positive says that you have the strength to rise above those low times…Keep chasing your dreams…and though it may seem it is the hardest thing to do sometimes…keep being you…Sending you positive vibes and thoughts and praying that everything falls through πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚


  6. And that’s precisely why I can only muster two posts a month these days!! 😜 LOL Maintaining uplifting creativity requires constantly shifting my perspective away from whatever is bringing me down… Suffice to say, you are NOT alone — Sending you positive energy and sincere wishes for new beginnings more aligned with your passions!! p.s. Thanks for the beautiful tulip picture, made me smile.

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  7. It is reassuring to know I’m not alone in this! One solution for me would be to offer simpler posts with just photos, which was my first passion. Or maybe I’ll start writing dark poems to honor my more challenging feelings! Today I’m more upbeat. Thanks for the cheers! πŸ™‚

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  8. Brad, my friend, I want to congratulate you on creating in your field of experience precisely that which is most likely to induce you into accepting your true nature and enjoying an astounding freedom for the rest of time and beyond. It is beautiful to behold.


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  9. Brad, I’ve definitely had that feeling of internal unrest lately. I interpreted it to mean that I had to make doing something about my main concern my top priority–forward march! Everything else had to take second place while I focused on my goal unrelentingly. I did that, and I’m starting to see good results, so I recommend this approach πŸ™‚

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  10. You know Brad, sometimes the hardest posts we write are the ones which come from deep within as we do battle with our our conflicting views.. But as I read your words, I can also sense that you do know what to do to change this situation.. Maybe the Spring will give you the impetus to face this challenge..

    Trusting with a capital T is also hard… But sometimes that is what we have to do.. Its hard not to ‘Feel’ in control of situations, especially when we are the bread winners and need to provide..

    I have found through my own experiences that when I have resisted the flow, and gone against my instincts I have come unstuck.. and the tunnel I have found myself in has been even longer and harder to come out of..

    Trusting in our gut and in what ‘Feels Right’ Trusting in the ‘Flow’ and allowing ourselves to be guided with our intuition is what I have found then opens up more opportunities..
    Its a scary process, stepping out into the unknown with no support systems other than our own inner guidance mechanisms, But you know we are far from alone.. And always we are being spoken to, guided and nudged in the right direction. Within our thoughts, and the ‘Signs’ are often there pointing at us to follow them..

    It seems you are listening to your Inner You.. That Higher you always has your best interests at heart..
    I know once you do Trust and make those first steps to changing your direction.. Spring will surely then be in every step you take

    Good Luck in all you do
    Blessings Sue

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  11. I don’t think you alone Brad! The world is going through some massive changes, everyone has to see this is the time for a monumental change of attitudes. Some of us are aware of this you being one, you posts inspire many towards the correct path of sustainability, keep that up! The system currently is designed to make it hard, somtimes I wonder where I’m going to find the money to put food on the table, but I believe and between me and my wonderful other half we manage. Your posts inspire and share amzings stories thanks

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  12. Thank you so much. It touches me to know that I help and inspire you. And yes, the current systems are very challenging for many of us. I hope you find ways to move forward with joy and hope.
    blessings, Brad


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