Is today a happy Father’s Day?
Are you at peace with your relationship to your father?
Reading posts around the internet, it appears that many of us still have “daddy issues”. I mean no disrespect. I’ve been there, had many issues with my father and gradually reclaimed my peace and restored our relationship over a lifetime.
Some of us love our fathers, some of us hate our fathers and many have a range of mixed emotions. Hopefully as we age, we learn that they did the best they could, even if it doesn’t look or feel like they did. I personally went from feeling anger and resentment over my father being mostly absent in our lives (physically and emotionally), to a place of compassion and seeing life from his perspective, ultimately embracing our oneness.
The bigger picture is that he worked crazy rotating shift work, wasn’t taught how to love or express feelings and did provide a comfortable home and life for my mom, brother and I. When I look at his childhood pictures, I see a very grim and emotionally shut down family. It’s no wonder why he didn’t express his feelings, unless provoked by my mom or alcohol.
As I opened to compassion and looked beyond the limited view I had of my father, which was highly influenced by my mother, I gradually realized they equally contributed to their unhappy and dysfunctional marriage. As many of us have learned, it takes two people to create a relationship, for the good or bad.
My life has been a journey to reclaim my ability to love and express freely.
Learning how to enjoy life without alcohol and other crutches, as well as how to deal with challenging emotions. I’m much more comfortable expressing my inner thoughts and feelings. I no longer let alcohol, pain and repressed emotion to rule my life. And most importantly, I’ve found compassion for both my father and for myself. Here’s a related post on returning to love. Forgiveness has been a big part of the process.
As the photos of my dad reflect, we all have many “faces” that we wear over the course of a day or life. And unfortunately, too few people live aligned with their divine self, radiating the beauty of their soul in daily life. When we’re around those earth angels, we feel love, joy and complete acceptance. It feels like a blessing simply to be in their presence. Thank You!
My father died many years ago, so I had to reclaim and repair our relationship on my own. If your father is alive, I encourage you to make peace now. The good news is that I’m getting much better at letting go of sad his-stories, opening the space for joyful presents. XD
Now, I’m mostly free to be myself as I choose. Here is a related post on the power of choice. Will you set yourself free with forgiveness and compassion? It doesn’t cost anything except a little pride and the willingness to see our darkness reflected in other people.
Offering you wishes for a blessed Father’s Day.