Connection can open up new vistas, feelings and spaces for love.
This post is dedicated to my friends, online and off.
Thank you to my friends and readers for caring enough to connect. Friendship is such an ordinary, yet profound experience. I realized after talking with my friend Dave that I felt much better than before our phone call. To many readers, this may not seem like much of an insight, but some of us (often men) think we have to do things on our own. It can be hard to ask for help or to reach out to another person for connection.
Dave and I talked about our lives and what was happening, but the breakthrough for me came when I realized he was truly listening. I had a space to be myself, along with my imperfections and challenges. Dave wasn’t trying to fix or solve my problems, a typical motivation for many of us, especially men who seem to be hardwired for problem solving. The greater gift was simply being heard and accepted for who I am.
We both acknowledged that it can be hard to listen without wanting to fix. Some emotions are hard to allow and feel. We want the feeling to go away. Paradoxically, the best way to make a feeling go away is to allow it! By embracing our feelings, we allow them to flow and move through our lives instead of being suppressed to build up; creating problems, issues and diseases. We want to control life, even though it’s not really possible. We can plan, make goals, take action and influence life, but we are not in control. We are co-creators, but not masters. God, life, spirit is the master. We can learn to work with life as co-creators by Saying Yes to Life.
After the call, I was feeling grateful and wondered what helps us open to more life. Having people we care about might be the greatest treasure in life. My relationship account is a little low at this time. I have many “friends” on Facebook and readers of my blog, but I haven’t been investing the time and energy to build my personal relationships the last few years. The kind where we can give and receive a hug, a smile, or simply relax and be in a space of acceptance. Many of us are so busy with the activities of life, planning to conquer the world of business and goals, that we forget to celebrate the heart connections that nurture our souls.
Connecting with something bigger than ourselves is another way to expand our lives and capacity to love.
This gets to the question of meaning. Again, you parents and folks living your purpose already know this. I’ve lived a fairly comfortable, but self-centered life, without a bigger reason for living. It’s not very satisfying. Recently, my purpose seems be unfolding through my blog by connecting and helping uplift others on the journey of life. Thank you to my readers for allowing me the space to share and connect.
A meaningful life is the best way to have a happy and fulfilling life. I’m working on this. My broader purpose is to be love with a more personal focus to uplift others. This blog allows me to share my gifts for writing, connecting and inspiring as I expand the ways to love and serve others. As I’ve written, my intentions for 2014 are to love more, develop my compassion and make better decisions. Life is a process, not a destination.
I practice gratitude, spend time in nature and many other ways to create connections, but having someone who cares enough to reach out, listen and accept you. That’s a priceless gift. Thank you brother Dave.